"Tubby Bitch" is a song that Moon Man recorded for his first Christmas album, A KKKhristmas KKKarol. It is a parody of "You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch" as performed by Thurl Ravenscroft. It was produced by Malcolm Night.
In the song, Moon Man focuses exclusively on fat women and how disgusting they are.
You're a big one, tubby bitch You really are a whale You're as weighty as a walrus, you're less shapely than a pail Tubby bitch Your heart is severely overworked and it's Going to fail
You're a monster, tubby bitch You have no self-control Your tits are giant Christmas hams, your mouth's a gaping hole Tubby bitch I wouldn't touch you with a Thirty-nine-and-a-half-foot pole
You're a vile one, tubby bitch You're a glob of greasy meat You have all the tender sweetness of an elephant in heat Tubby bitch Given the choice between the two of you, I'd take the um Elephant in heat
You're disgusting, tubby bitch You're a heaving, heaping hoss Your heart's a blob of butter, and your ass is growing moss Tubby bitch You're a three-decker bacon cheese and Crisco sandwich topped with Chocolate sauce
You nauseate me, tubby bitch Yes, I vomit when you smile And the stench of death surrounds you, it extends about a mile Tubby bitch Your gut is an appalling dump heap Overflowing with the most disgraceful assortment of rubbish imaginable Puddled up with Bubbling bile
You a foul one, tubby bitch You're a nasty rotten skank We should haul you out to sea, 'cause you're too fat to walk the plank Tubby bitch The thirty-eight words that best describe you are as follows, and I quote: "Morbidly obese. "Completely repulsive. "Why don't you go ahead and kill yourself and get it over with and stop hogging our medical resources, you fat ratchet waste of space. Stop blaming your metabolism. You're a goddamn fucking pig."